Snowy Day

The guys, Erin, and I packed her van and drove off to the sledding hill, yesterday.  With screams of delight, unstoppable giggles, and maybe just a little bit of boyhood mischief, we had an unforgettable day.  I'm not sure if my favorite part was Erin rolling down the hill or perhaps, Landon walking up the hill murmuring, "My Precious," while hiding the boot he stole from the little man at the bottom of the hill.  Gotta love boys!!!!

The Big Boys taking care of Willow.

Look carefully.... Erin is rolling, rolling, rolling.....

Landon hauling down the hill.

The True Meaning of Christmas

People are absolutely amazing.  As much as this struggle has been hard to watch, from my perspective, and hard to live from Erin and Claire's perspective.... it is so astounding to see the good in people.

Duncan and Bennett, high school students and athletes coached by Erin's brother, Alex, started a fundraising campaign with some friends and fellow runners.  Duncan has shared that the money was donated from other cross country families, other students, as well as families from the school that do not know Coach Broughton.  Additionally, members of a local running club donated funds, too.  They received donations from people as young as 10 to senior citizens.  Awesome!  The guys collected numerous donations ranging from $5 to $1000 by one generous family.  AMAZING!  Duncan and Bennett presented Alex with gift cards to Amazon.com and Walmart, as well as a very substantial check.  I love seeing kids take the initiative to give back.  Alex, you must mean so much to these boys!!  Duncan, Bennett, and crew, thank you for looking out for your awesome coach.  This is the very essence of the Christmas spirit.  Your Spokane friends are so extremely proud of you!!

I called Erin yesterday and asked if I could come crash her house.  (Truthfully, I had some good news for her and a bottle of wine I was given, with the caveat I drink it with Erin and Claire.)  Luckily, Erin said to come on over, but that she needed a couple of minutes.  She said within seconds of hanging up the phone with me, the doorbell rang.  She wasn't quite dressed yet and went running to the door, throwing on mismatched sweats and a marines knit cap.  Erin's guests were a local boy scout troop that "adopted" Erin, Claire, and the family for Christmas.  The boys delivered presents and a meal.  That is so incredibly awesome!  I just wish I had been a little faster and could have seen it, too.

Yesterday, a friend of mine, Ginger, texted me to say she wanted to pick up a ham for the family for Christmas.  What a fabulous idea!!!  Well, she called the "Honey Baked Ham" company near North Town Mall in Spokane, to order a ham.  In talking with the owner, she shared a bit about Erin and Claire's story.  The owner, Shawna, said that she rarely watches television, but caught the interview on KXLY a couple of weeks ago.  She was moved by the story and is donating an entire Christmas dinner from her company to Erin and family, complete with side dishes and all the fixings.  AWESOME!!!!!  It is heartwarming to see companies going above and beyond to help support friends in the community.... or in this case, to support complete strangers.  Thank you so much to Shawna and Jeff with Honey Baked Ham.  Your dinner will make their Christmas extra special and a whole lot easier to prepare.  Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

So.... how are they?  Claire is really doing well - at least from my naive perspective.  We shared some wine and laughs yesterday.  I was surprised to see her up and about, just like normal.  She has found that staying on top of the pain med regimen really is the key, as well as being gentle with her arm during this healing process.  With the help of Erin and Terry, she is making it work.  She also was planning on braving the stores and doing a little Christmas shopping yesterday.  Unbelievable.  I guess I never really thought about the recovery time for a mastectomy, but I never would have imagined she would be up and at 'em this quickly.  I know she is tired and sore, to say the least, but I am encouraged by how active she is.

Erin is in very good spirits, actually acting a touch goofier than me at times, shocking, I know!!!  She was truly a sight yesterday, in red, sock monkey pajama pants, a bright pink sweatshirt, a blue-green nightgown hanging out of the sweatshirt, and alternating hats between the marines cap and a penguin hat.  Although, my favorite was the platinum blond wig, pushed waaaaaayyyyy back on her head, leaving a monk-like forehead.  Awesome.  And, the best news of all, wine finally tastes good to Erin again.  Whew.  I was worried our friendship wouldn't make it through that little speed bump.

A Great Day!

Miraculously, Claire came home from the hospital last night.  She is resting in her own bed, with her family doting on her.  She has had some soreness, but Erin is making sure she keeps on top of her pain med regimen.

Erin and David took the boys out today for a little lunch, and perhaps to give Claire and Terry some blissful quiet.  My guys and I joined them for a crazy fun time at Chuck E. Cheese.  The boys scampered through the restaurant with coins weighing down their pockets and tickets flowing behind them.  And, when the tokens were spent, they ran about playing some type of imaginary fighting game, all while dodging each other and hiding behind machines.  Their silliness was absolutely contagious.

Brief Claire Update

Erin shared with me that Claire is out of surgery.  The doctor said it went well.  Terry shared that there were no surprises during the surgery.  Definitely a good sign!!!  I will post more as I hear it.  Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

Claire's Turn for Surgery

Some of the time, I covet the strength, stamina, and tenacity of this amazing family.  Most of the time, I feel really guilty to be blessed with great health while others have so much on their plates .... this experience really does give me pause.  All of the time, I know how extremely lucky I am to be friends with such fabulous people like Claire, Erin, and their families.

Stamina and endurance will be gracing this family as they take another big step (or leap!!!!) this week.  Claire's surgeon felt moving up her mastectomy would be the best plan.  Claire has had a minor, but annoying, complication since her lymphnodectomy last month, that could eventually lead to infection.  Unfortunately, chemo compromises the immune system and leaves Claire at a disadvantaged state to battle that possibility.  So, Claire's surgery (single mastectomy) is scheduled for this Wednesday, December 19th, first thing in the morning.  At this point, she is scheduled to spend one night in Sacred Heart Hospital.

When we knew that she would definitely be facing a mastectomy, I tried to think of the positives.  I made *genius* comments about how Claire has a great husband who will love her no matter what the surgeon has to take from her, and that she won't be having any more babies, so nursing isn't an issue.  I was truly trying to find the silver lining to a cloud that really should just be allowed to be a bitter, dark, ugly cloud.  Claire said to me, "Well, this is the first body part I have ever had to say goodbye to."  To me, that statement was so, so powerful.  I needed that perspective.

This absolutely sucks and will not be easy.  And, regardless of her love and support system, Claire is so absolutely allowed to feel this loss and mourn it.  If I had to walk in her shoes, I know I would share those sentiments.  Thank you Claire, for showing me that side.  It used to be in our society, that we were allowed to mourn.  Widows and widowers wore black ribbons on their arms for a year following the loss of their beloved spouse, trauma was met with love, support and understanding, etc.  Those things still happen in some ways, but all too often, geniuses (like me) just want to make everyone feel better, to take away the pain, and to get back to just being happy.

Claire, you are allowed to mourn the loss of your breast.  You are allowed to be angry.  You are allowed to grieve.  You are the one who will face the scars each and every day.  I am angry, too.  I am at a loss as to why this has happened.  Truly there is no reasonable explanation that I can fathom.  The silver lining for your family and friends is that YOU will still be here and that YOU are not defined by your breast.  I think I will just have to tie a black ribbon around my boob....  wait.... that won't work.  Maybe just a black bow on my bra each day?  I don't know.  Just know that you are loved and that yes, this completely sucks but is so worth it, to save YOU.

Terry has returned to Spokane and will be holding Claire's hand through this process.  Thank you to the many families and friends in Ajo who took great care of him.  Terry has shared with me only a portion of all the amazing things that have happened in your awesome community.  I know he appreciates the sale, the caring conversations, the meals, everything!!  Claire is so grateful that while he wasn't by her side, he was feeling the love and support of so many in Ajo.  I will try to update you via this blog as soon as I know anything.  Thank you for keeping Terry and Claire in your thoughts and prayers this week.

Happy Birthday, Gavin!!!!

Gavin will be turning 12 on the last day of the Mayan Calendar - talk about a bummer of a present!  He has joked and laughed about that prediction.  This weekend, he had a Mine Craft birthday party at his home.  I'm sure he celebrated early because of the imminent doom to our world.  Gavin enjoyed time with friends, video games, a crazy pillow fight, pizza, and the most original "cake" I have ever seen.  Erin has always amazed me with her incredible creativity.  She made a Mine Craft cake out of brownies and green rice krispie treats.  My boys said it looked just like a "creeper," some type of a monster on the video game.  I'm sure Mine Craft fans will know exactly what that means.

Happy Birthday, Gavin!!!  I hope you enjoyed every minute of it.  AND, thank you for not singing "Gangnam Style" too many times while your mom's irritable friend with a slight aversion to that song was around.  Next year, teenager!!!!

Home Again!!!

Landon made it home today!  I'm sure he and his weary parents are appreciating some time to rest away from the hospital.... that family has spent more time at Sacred Heart in the last five months than any family should in a lifetime!!!  In any case, I bet they are all so glad Landy Lou is home and doing well.  Thanks for the continued prayers and positive thoughts.

Christmas Wish Pictures

It feels a little strange to post the happiness from yesterday while Landon is in the hospital.  In any case, it helps to see the joy and excitement that surrounded our Christmas Wish experience yesterday.  Thank you so much to 92.9, the Dave, Ken and Molly morning show, KXLY, Yokes, Avista, Sharleen, the elves, Down River Grill, the list goes on..... Thank you to all of you!  OH, and a huge, huge, HUGE, thank you to our photographer, Jennifer Holm.  As always, great pictures!

Waiting for the big surprise!

Taking it all in, watching her boys and my boys enjoying the surprises.

Part of the Christmas Wish crew and friends.

An amazing moment.....

Erin chatting with Dave on the radio.

Erin and Claire.  Amazing, amazing women.

Landon Update

I don't have a lot of information, but I have heard that Landon is out of surgery and doing well.  He is at Sacred Heart, with both parents by his side.  Landon is a strong, sensational boy and will no doubt sail through his recovery.  Thank you for the continued thoughts and prayers for this sweet family.

Landy Lou

Well, life just keeps going, one way or another.  Tomorrow will be another big day on this family's roller coaster ride.  Landon is scheduled for heart surgery.  When he was just a few weeks old, sweet baby Landon was admitted to the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit for his heart.  While there, he received an internal pacemaker.  His situation was scary and grim.  His family was told to "enjoy your baby."  I'm not sure exactly what that statement meant, but Erin remembers it was made in response to her questions about what to expect in the future.  Landon turned six years old last month and is doing extraordinarily well.  Tomorrow, in many ways, is a celebration.  Landon made it. Landon's little heart is doing better than ever anticipated and his pacemaker is coming out.  He will be in Sacred Heart hospital overnight, but should come home on Thursday.  I will post updates as I hear them.  Please keep sweet Landy Lou in your thoughts and prayers tomorrow, along with his brave, strong family.  Just like his mama and his grandma, Landon is a fighter.

Christmas Wish!!!!!

Today was incredible, absolutely, positively incredible.  Year after year, one of our local radio stations, 92.9 ZZU, grants fabulous holiday wishes to families who have come upon hard times.  Through a letter, I shared Erin and Claire's unbelievable story and nominated them to receive one of the generous Christmas Wish deliveries.  About two weeks ago, the call came sharing that their wish would be granted.  It took some creativity, a touch of conspiracy, and a whole lot of lying to actually surprise this family, especially savvy Erin.  With many friends in tow, and Nik staged at the house getting the kids ready, we followed the KXLY camera crew and our head elf to Erin's door.  The looks on their faces will be in my heart forever.  Erin thought I was bringing a high school journalism student by to interview her... um.... not quite.  I can only imagine her surprise.  It was so awesome.  ZZU Christmas Wish blessed them with many wonderful surprises as so many friends and my own family watched on.  The sight of Erin's boys snuggled on the couch with my own little men, digging through the gifts cannot even be described.  That moment truly was what Christmas should be about - crazily happy children, enjoying a perfect, cancer-free morning.  Erin's living room positively overflowed with pure holiday joy that could be felt by all.  Thank you so much to Christmas Wish, ZZU, all of their sponsors, and KXLY News.  After the surprise, the news crew stayed and interviewed Claire, who literally woke up in the middle of the mayhem, and Erin.  I'm excited to see their fighting spirit shine through in their segment.  

Once all of the elves and crew were on their merry way, we broke open some champagne and shared mimosas and donuts.  What an incredible, unbelievable morning.  I feel so, so fortunate to share in all of this with my wonderful friends.  Ladies, I just love you and am glad today was a bright spot in this difficult journey.

The recording of Erin and Claire's surprise can be found here: Christmas Wish.  Their wish is #6.  Enjoy!!!!  Pictures to follow soon!

Great Weekend

This weekend, I had the pleasure of taking Erin and Claire to the Davenport Hotel to see the trees on display for Christmas Tree Elegance.  We had a wonderful time!!!  Between the banter, the really tall college basketball players breezing by us, the seriously short people in the lounge.... we had a ball.  Erin and I giggled loudly every time Claire ran off to leave her ticket in the raffle box for the next tree with a larger cash prize.  It was so, so fun.

After the trees, we spent some time in the glamorous Peacock Lounge.  It was so amazing to visit, share some yummy food, and sip beverages.  Claire made a comment like, "Who knew a simple day out of the house could feel so liberating?"  What a fabulous reminder!  So much to be thankful for.

Last night, the three of us enjoyed a movie, a yummy dinner.... if I do say so myself, and some time to chat.  I loved it.  These two ladies are so incredible.  I have no health updates, but will post as soon as I am able.  While we were relaxing, our four boys were totally crazy.  There *might* have been a touch of squabbling, but mostly we enjoyed their silly giggles and their goofy conversations.  Little boys are simply amazing.

Do you know why he wears a hat???

Tonight, I was lucky enough to visit with Erin and Claire for a little bit.  Thank you, Somer, for another delicious meal.  This time, I stayed for dinner, chatted, and ate way too much, YUM!!!!  Somer is a mom of one of my sweet first graders and has never met Erin or Claire.  This is the fourth meal she has sent in the three months I have known her.  Thank you!!!  These gestures, Somer's and those of so many others, make us all smile and remember the genuine goodness in people.  In some ways, that means even more than the food and care packages.  Thank you!!!!

Erin and Claire were doing ok.  This round of chemo has not been too friendly with Claire.  She and Erin both said today was better than yesterday, but still a tiring, hard day.  Claire's natural spunk and good humor were there, but slightly hidden under a small mountain of fatigue.  Hopefully, as she distances herself from last Monday's chemo treatment, she will grow in strength and energy.  If you would like to encourage sweet Claire, cards can be sent to Claire Bistline, 3118 W Grace, Spokane WA 99205.  Thank you for continuing to keep this loving mom and grandma in your thoughts and prayers.

Erin doesn't have a lot of answers about her own test results.  She has a really awesome oncologist who has traveled out of town to attend a conference about Erin and Claire's specific form of cancer.  I pray she comes back with the right tools to gain ground and defeat their cancer.  Erin will be meeting with her to discuss treatment options as soon as she returns.  If I hear anything, I will update right away.

The part I never realized about these journeys is that normal day to day "life" must go on.  Homework, sleepovers, sports, dinner, laundry, it doesn't stop for cancer.  I guess I never considered that side, especially for a busy single mom of two boys.  During this Christmas season, Erin's guys have been visited by a very naughty "Elf on the Shelf."  While I was there, Landon finally found the evasive elf, Calvin, hiding in the sugar canister.  As Landon was peeking at him, he said, "Hey Kim, I know why he wears a hat, do you?"  I quickly retorted with, "Well, I think he might be a cone head."  Landon replied, "NO, he is an ELF not a CONEHEAD!  He wears a hat because he is a bald elf....."  ....just like Landon's sweet mama and grandma.  As much as life keeps going on day in and day out, cancer threads its way into daily life, too.  While his comment made me giggle and made me proud of his open mind, it also slammed the reality of his life in my face.  He and his brother are so unbelievably brave.  I am incredibly proud of both of them.  They are the light that is shining on their mom and grandma through all of this.  Thank you for continuing to keep this entire unstoppable family in your thoughts and prayers. 

aaaaaaaaggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh

Results.....  Erin found out from her oncologist that the tumor that was removed last week still had active cancer cells.  Damn it!!!  What that means is that the chemo did not phase her cancer at all.  Her tumor did not shrink and was resistant to the chemo treatments.  Damn it!!!!  Whatever Plan B is, Erin will definitely face it head on and fight this stupid cancer beast.  I have very few answers, but I pray that Erin, Claire, and their family will sail through this holiday season with their eyes set on many more happy times to come. Please keep Erin in your thoughts and prayers.  She is simply amazing.  Hopefully, the months ahead will be kind and gentle to our dear friend and her mama.  Damn it, damn it, damn it.

With Love, from Ajo

Claire called me today with awesome, awesome news.  She and Terry received a very excited call from their friends in Ajo, AZ last night.  I have never been to Ajo, but Claire said it is a fairly isolated smaller community, with a population of less than 5,000 people.  She and Terry have been spending the cold months there since 1997.  In that time, they have made many close friends, some from the start, and some more recently.  The Ajo community rallied together and scheduled a yard and vegetable sale this weekend.  The Community Support Agriculture Group donated the profits from the sales of their home grown vegetables.  Yard sale items were donated prior to the sale and were sold to benefit Claire.  From what I have heard, the extent of the donated items was tremendous, especially for a smaller community.  Claire and Terry were so excited to hear the conference call from so many of their dearly beloved friends in Ajo.  I believe that call just might have brought some tears of joy.  I could hear the excitement in Claire's voice as she shared the energy from her friends.  I'm also hearing rumblings of more benefit activities in that neck of the woods.  I am so, so excited.  I often worry that as we rally to support this sweet family on the northern end, that I often focus on Erin and overlook Claire.  Due to her kind, caring, and humble demeanor, I know Claire would never complain for a second about my focus on her amazing daughter.  In any case, I am so glad that she has a chance to feel the love and support from her Ajo family.  To all her Ajo friends and family, thank you for organizing this event, sharing your excitement, and sending your energy to sweet Claire.  She needed that!!!

Erin is doing well post-surgery.  She has some soreness at the incision site and is a touch tired.  On the whole, she is faring very, very well.  Of course, we are all on pins and needles for the pathology reports.  Those should come in this week.  Hopefully, the results will show the cancer cells within the mass are dead.  I will update as soon as I know.  Claire is scheduled for her third round of chemo tomorrow - half way!!! I'm hoping that she handles this treatment well and the aftermath is tolerable.  As a mom, I cannot imagine how hard it must be for her to take care of herself  and watch her daughter, too.  It is really so unreal.  Hang in there ladies!!!  I've said this whole community is behind you, but I was so wrong, at least two whole communities (and probably more) are sending you so much love, prayers, and support.  It is a testament to you both that so many people love you, support you, and would do absolutely anything to help out during this journey.  You both are simply amazing.