I visited with Erin and her family for a little while tonight. She and I enjoyed some much needed girl talk, a few giggles about our crazy lives, spicy gossip that keeps us sane, and perhaps a foul sentiment aimed directly at the heart of cancer. That woman simply amazes me. She could hardly open her eyes, but had the spunk for some good old fashion girl time. I don't know how she does it. If I had a fraction of Erin's strength, I would be ready to take on the world. She is absolutely phenomenal.
As far as her journey goes, today was really the manure phase. Erin struggled with pretty severe body aches, nausea, and just generally feeling like she had been hit by a truck. I was watching her restless legs while listening to the quiet groans she tried to sneak by me and I told her, "There has to be a better way to fight this bull shit. We need a better way." Without missing a beat, Erin replied, "Thank God there is a way to fight it in the first place." How does she do that? Erin should have full license to share her struggles, complain about the unfairness of her situation, just share a good bitch session with a friend, but through it all, she is remaining grateful. She is grateful for the drugs that make her body ache all over and hurt too much to move. She is grateful for the chemo that is waging war on her cancer cells and, unfortunately, some healthy cells along the way. She is grateful for the shot that after the physical pain has worn off, causes significant nausea. She is grateful for all of it because all of these things are helping her destroy the cancer demon that is residing within and ultimately, claim back her healthy life. How Erin pulls that out through the storm is simply miraculous. Honestly, her response gave me chills, humbled my foul little mouth, and made me sit back and realize that perspective is huge. Erin's glass isn't half full, it is all the way full of strength, positive spirit, humor, humility, and above all, a deep love for her family, her sweet boys, and her friends.
Thank you for continuing to support her through cards, care packages, meals, babysitting, donations at STCU.... all of it. Erin shared with me so many of her sweet cards, loving notes, and gifts that have ended up in her mailbox. I am so overjoyed to see this compassion. We all feel the bubble of love that is surrounding our sweet Erin and helping hold her hand through this. Thank you.